F.S. Comeau

1-Stinky Lady   We’ve done it. We’ve finally done it. Here is the most annoying hobo in the café – maybe in the entire world. Stinky Lady, in simple terms, is an extremely malodorous woman who importunes everyone within a 5 miles radius. It’s hard to explain just how terribly awful she smells so I’m […]

2-Snoring Asshole   And we are now at the second most annoying hobo on the list: Snoring Asshole. This one doesn’t need a description. He is just a moron who is there every single night without exception and, well, who sleeps, and snores. Loudly. Fucking, very loudly. It’s insane, what the fuck does he thinks […]

3- MUH-UH-NUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHH   This guy… Holy shit, this guy… This fucking guy… There are very little things scarier than an absolutely crazy, thick-bearded, filthy-to-the-bones hobo wearing an overused brown jacket screaming at the top of lungs: “MUH-UH- NUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHH” all night long while throwing strange and crazy looks at everyone.  This fucking guy spends his time […]

4-Meteofag   Ugh, we’ve made it to one of the most annoying person I have ever met (and, sadly, talked to) in my entire life: Meteofag. Similar to Biblefreak and his obsession with the Bible, Meteofag is obsessed with meteorology and, specifically, whether it’s going to rain or not. He talks about the chances of […]

5-Armless Arry   I call him “Armless Arry,” but “Harmless Harry” would be just as right: he doesn’t have lower arms (he has hands and upper arms, though; he’s kind of like that guy in King of the Hill, but arm-wise), and I doubt he could cause any real harm. Armless Arry is, when he […]

6- Biblefreak No top ten list would be complete without a proper religious maniac. When sane, religifreaks tend to be boring, condescending, idiotic and overzealous (okay, stepping on the “sane” part a bit here) imbeciles. When insane, thankfully, they tend to provide some of the best entertainment in the world. Sadly, Biblefreak lands between the […]

7-Staring Dyke   This “lady” has killed more erections than smoking, hypertension, obesity and curious close-up shots in pornography all together. There is something so incredibly unattractive about her that I just can’t put it in words (there is something incredibly unattractive about being homeless altogether, I must say). Staring Dyke has the weirdest ponytail […]

8- Weirdo   There is no other way to describe that person. He’s just… weird! Weirdo (not to be confused with Birdo) looks like a fish and has the curliest hair I can imagine. It’s like his hair was hit by a tornado or something – or maybe his hair is a tornado. Weirdo is […]

9- Drunk or Passed Out?   This guy is surprisingly not annoying. He is at the café every night without exception (he hasn’t missed a single night in a year) and, well, he never moves. Ever. He just sits at a table in the back sleeping, his body slightly leaned forward and his head in […]

10-The Black Lady   If we were living in Skyrim, this woman would give the most interesting quests, ever. Very simply put, she is one of the most mysterious person I have ever met, down to the Heisenberg-type hat (the Breaking Bad guy, I don’t think the real Heisenberg ever wore hats). Spotlessly clean, neat, […]